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Tuesday · October 19 2004

In a tiny examining room, Stacy and I heard a new heartbeat. 11 times in 5 seconds. Pounding faster than the quick dribble of a basketball, but slower than a Ted Leo song. That's the pulse of someone with alot of growing left to do.

How big? The doctor stretched her thumb and middle finger apart and pointed to the span in between.

You may have heard the rumors, but, today, I'm making the announcement. Another Keglovitz is on the way.

I'm here to answer some of the questions you might have.

How did this happen?
If you read the popular (A-list, as they're known) blogs, you know that blogging and pregnancy are highly correlated. I don't know if it's the examination of self and meaning that comes from writing or if we need babies to ensure we have at least one person who will always leave us comments, even on our dumbest posts. The true answer is Stacy wanted to have a baby and I agreed on the condition our child never be allowed to use a shitty browser like Internet Explorer — at least in my presence. That's how it happened.

When is the baby due?
April 28 is the official date. If the baby has a good share of my genes, s/he'll be in a good, nervous fit by April 5 that “we're gonna be late if you don't hurry up, Stace.” If the baby is more like Stacy, s/he'll decide it's time to get moving around April 27, take its time, and come out smiling and beautiful April 30.

Are you going to go all-out baby on us?
No. I'd probably run out of adjectives to describe the next 16 years of my life in about 4 posts. I'll share it as it comes. My core values will not change: Children should be seen and not heard.

Any names in mind?
I'm working on boy names, since the popular girl names are easy; throw a few letters together and end it with an 'a'. I tried using the names of NFL players for inspiration. During the Bears-Redskins game, every time a player made a good play, I'd point to Stacy's stomach and try out a cheer for that player. Laveranues Coles and Cornelius Griffin made a number of quality catches and tackles for the Skins, so we had alot of, “Yay, Laveranues!” and “Go, Cornelius!” I tried masking Laveranues Cornelius Keglovitz as L.C. Keglovitz, but Stacy gave it a solid veto.

How will you decorate the baby's room?
I want to cover the walls with indie rock posters (like this one). Stacy mentioned something about a safari theme. I suspect I'll get at least one wall, which I consider a victory.

You sound like you're not taking this seriously. Are you ready for this?
Of course I'm not ready. According to cliche, nobody is. Stacy and I are good at taking things in stride. If I say things will be just fine, you'll tell me how much my life is going to change. If I fret about how much my life will change, you'll tell me things will be just fine. So, yeah, I'm taking it seriously, but with the usual humor and curiosity. I'm ready, but I'm not. I think we'll be great parents, and I know we'll make mistakes. Our lives will irreversibly change, but we'll still be Jason and Stacy.

And L.C.

11 beats in 5 seconds. Pretty damn exciting.

What you had to say:
October 19 2004

Such wonderful news! I'm so glad it's public now. ;)
You guys are going to be terrific parents.

I'm backing Stace on the veto on L.C., though.

October 19 2004

How thrilling! Hearing the heartbeat for the 1st time makes it seem "real" somehow. (at least it did for me) I have a week by week pregnancy book that is constantly comparing the baby's size to various fruits and vegetables. I believe yours may be a "large orange" by now based on the doctor's description.

October 19 2004

Very cool news. Congratulations!

Perhaps your baby will prefer Apple's sleek yet powerful Safari browser when he/she grows up.

October 19 2004

Good point, Stef, about making it "real". I asked the doctor, "are you sure she's pregnant?" Other than the missed periods and gagging on toothpaste, there hasn't been much evidence of a pregnancy. The pounding heartbeat changed that.

Large orange sounds about right.

October 19 2004

Woo! Congratulations!

I think Thor is the perfect boy's name. Or you could skip straight to the kid's future career as a child rap star: Lil Kegz.

October 19 2004

A kid in my high school was named Thor and he had the shoulders to handle it. Unless your kid is going to be big and meaty, you shouldn't saddle him with a name like that.

October 19 2004

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ! !

Wow, this is very exciting.

By the way, when John wrote "your baby will prefer Apple's sleek yet powerful Safari browser" I had to read it again and again. I thought he was talking about little baby Apple, Gwyneth Paltrow's kiddie, and was like WOW! That baby already has her own computer?!?

October 19 2004

I'm gonna be an auntie!! whoo hoo- I'm so excited for the two of you- that's going to be one spoiled niece or nephew of mine- watch out! :)

October 19 2004

Congratulations to both of you. This is so exciting. I am so happy for you. And, thanks for including your online friends in your joy.

October 19 2004

It's official !! (no sport-related pun intended..)
We share in all your excitement - of the gift that's been given you....

...there seems to be a big space between
"Stacy wanted to have a baby........
and I agreed." ..but, oh well, never mind.....

I've never been this brazen about these types of things - and have always waited out my time to "observe" the baby's growth... mom's cravings... you know- the usual wives tale clues..... but-
(I think you might need to go back to figuring out a girls name......)- just a hunch!

Dad's message: "Read the book I'm OK - Your OK."
(He claims that was his trusted parenting book.)
- actually we probably even have the copy...downstairs in one of the million boxes....

Dad is also glad to have another reason why he needs to buy the boat soon- "so the baby can go tubing...!!"

Congrats!!! Good Jobs!! etc.........
Dad & Dar

October 19 2004

Thank you all for the kind words. I know Stacy will be happy to read them when she gets back from Wisconsin tonight.

October 19 2004

I was kidding about Thor.

What I really meant was Thud. (This is what I tell Lisa I want to name our next dog)

October 20 2004

Thank you everyone for your nice messages. We are really excited about little L.C. and there isn't anything quite like hearing another heart beat! It really does make it more real since for the past month we have been examining my stomach for any signs of change to no avail.

October 20 2004

Fantastic news. Congratulations. The babies are coming fast and furious now among my friends.

Did you know about this when Anneke and Allen told you about their blessed event? I was in the back seat of the car with them when she called you and before the call was placed, we all agreed that there was a reasonable chance your response would be "Well that's great because we're having a baby too." It was just a gut feeling. But then that didn't happen and we were slightly disappointed.

October 20 2004

Good question, Reed. I think when Anneke called us we hadn't even told our parents yet. Since a couple weeks ago, we've told people in person sort of as we saw them. Then when we heard the heartbeat, we felt better posting to everyone.

Anneke and Allen, Stef and John, Us, Jes and Lisa at Stacy's work. Quite a few babies among our friends, all due within a span of a couple months.

October 20 2004

Babies are great, especially for a peripheral uncle figure like me that just swoops in, gives the kid lots of cool superhero related stuff, plays on the floor with him/her and then leaves whenever the diaper-changing, car-seat-engineering and how-to-pay-for-the-orthodontist type issues arise.

October 24 2004

Wow, congratulations! I had no idea you guys were in the market for some offspring. It does sound exciting... Hearing fetal heartbeats out of a body cavity that usually only produces random squeaky sounds is a great moment indeed. And the first of many I'm sure.

And I'd like to put in a second vote for Thud.

October 24 2004

CONGRATS, you guys!!!!! I love babies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so excited for you two. It's a good thing you have all this advice on all the a list blogs out there, you know? :)

© 2004 Jason Keglovitz