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Wednesday · January 14 2004

Maraschino sauce has an infinite shelf life according to the Periodic Table of Condiments. I'm bothered that maraschino is red formeldahyde in disguise. Scary is the squeeze bottle of Hershey's Chocolate Syrup sitting in my refrigerator door for the past 3-4 years. 6-8 months, pshaw.

Cheese Whiz, Baco Bits, and Salt? Infinite.

Show me one person who finishes a bottle of ketchup in 5 months.

What you had to say:
January 15 2004

I think our whole fridge is expired!

January 15 2004

Shoot. I'm going through the refrigerator tonight.

January 15 2004

Looking at their guidelines, I think they're full of crap. Some pro-condiment industry association likely developed that table to get us to throw away our old bottles and buy more condiments.

© 2004 Jason Keglovitz