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Wednesday · December 10 2003

Scanning the list of The Onion's Least Essential Albums Of 2003 reinforces a notion I've long held. Pop artists will scratch out a living with bargain bin releases, remastered reissues, and royalties from string quartet covers if that means not having to search the unemployment ads and sing jingles for Citibank home equity loans. How else to explain Danny Wood's (the forgotten 5th dog faced boy of NKOTB) solo career? An "essential" Stabbing Westward release? Or an all-female tribute album to Creed (which almost made me shoot coffee out my nose)?

In Stabbing Westward's case, they couldn't even get the Citibank jingle gig, but they're still ahead of Macho Man Randy Savage's career options. If I ever find Macho Man's rap album in the possession of anyone I know, they're disowned. No appeal, I'm going to pretend I never knew you.

And no shit, John Oates is still making records. I wonder what Roland Gift from Fine Young Cannibals is up to.

Archived: Listen » December 2003
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December 10 2003

OK, how's this for 6 degrees of separation. The wife of the bass player for Stabbing Westward used to be my boss. The two of them have since moved to San Francisco and opened a sub shop (a Potbelly ripoff from what I understand). Hardly "Behind the Music" material, but probably more lucrative than that "essential" collection of crapola.

December 10 2003

I think there's some similarity in talking about old pop stars and people who have disappeared since high school. It's more fun to bring up the name than to actually find out what they've been doing.

© 2003 Jason Keglovitz