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Tuesday · October 28 2003

School rules suck the fun out of everything. Many schools put restrictions on the costumes kids are allowed to wear on Halloween: no weapons, nothing bloody, no masks, nothing supernatural, no hair coloring. These are just some of the rules I've heard of recently. Maybe it's because I'm not a parent or I am not sensitive enough to the level of violence in schools, but I don't get it. Of course, when it comes to school boards and parent groups, I've never gotten it. They all seem like a bunch of overprotective fantaics hell bent on making everything to do with learning as vanilla and unfun as possible. But again, if I were a teacher and had to deal with kids everyday, I'd most likely feel differently.

When I was in 5th grade, every third kid was a vampire, a witch, or had some bloody mask. These were the easy, default costumes if your parents didn't have the time to create some elaborate getup. (Well, there were also those plastic Spiderman and Barbie things at Osco, but I'd rather show up in my yellow and brown uniform and say I forgot my costume than wear one of those. You'd have to hate your kid to make him wear a $2.99 Spiderman painted Hefty bag.)

If weapons weren't allowed, at least half of my grammar school costumes would have been lacking their main prop. What's a caveman without a club, a pirate without a sword, Robin Hood without a bow, and Merlin without his staff? Thinking back to those 4 years, each one of those costumes raided my mom's closet for belts, wigs, robes, and jewelry. If you saw my 3rd grade Halloween picture, you would agree it was far more disturbing to the classroom than a bloody mask or blue colored hair. I had a white fur/dark spotted Flintstone slipover thing, a fake wood club, and a huge blond afro wig. Even my mom laughed at me -- and she is the one who planned the disaster. I think laughing at your kid's "cuteness", even when you know they look like a dork to everyone except you, is one of the joys of parenting.

I haven't had a legitimate Halloween costume since high school. I like the idea of Halloween, but I guess I'm really more into the candy than anything else. Oh, and the pumpkins too.

What you had to say:
October 28 2003

Hey, maybe it's not half bad. My best costume was in 4th grade: the French painter. I wore a fake mustache and a beret and carried a paint palette around all day. I was really proud to have thought of it myself... Nevermind that the ghouls, ghosts, and goblins in school didn't seem to get it.

October 29 2003

My best costume was Catwoman. I wore it to my Catholic school Halloween dance. There isn't another costume around that more personified sex walking that that one & I didn't get more than a batted eye.
This year, I'm going as Lara Croft, complete with guns that shoot actual (albeit rubber) pellets. Sex *and* violence. It's that what Halloween is all about?
Wait. No. It's about candy.

October 31 2003

Yay!!! It's Halloween today!!!
I am dressing up as the (a?) Devil and heading out on the town with my friend Kim who will be dressed as a Girl Scout.

(Basically any excuse to wear fake eyelashes, red fishnets, a short red dress and big black boots without looking inappropriate makes me happy.)

© 2003 Jason Keglovitz